Leadership In The Geeky World
Leadership In The Geeky World
Geeks! Often times our brothers and sisters are looked down upon for our magnificent obsessions as we’ve grown up. Even in this day and age when being a geek is actually considered pretty darn cool, we can still be looked down upon for our interests, no longer by just our ignorant peers but now by geeks within our own ranks. You might say you love Dragon Ball Z and it is your favorite anime of all time and then a friend of yours objects to your affection and makes the claim that you have not seen a ‘good’ anime and therefore can not make that claim. Or you might say that Jessica Nigri is your favorite cosplay and then a friend of yours tells you that Abby Darkstar is better and because of your preference your opinion on all cosplay matters is thrown to the side.
This is called bullying and it’s not cool. However, we are not here to talk about bullying but rather the topic of leadership. The reason we are discussing this is because the worst part of bullying is that folks often choose to submit to their bully rather than standing up for themselves. Whether it’s in high school, at the bar with friends, or even in the workplace, leadership matters.
Let’s begin by first explaining the difference between being a follower and being a leader. A follower gives his opinion, receives feedback and then alters his public opinion or actions according to
what is publicly accepted, despite being drastically different than his own views due to peer pressure. This is common because as geeks, we’ve known the cold, harsh feeling of rejection and hate it with every fiber of our being. We then secretly try our best to fit into the norm so we won’t stand out so much. On the other hand, a leader states her opinion, hears out her peers, takes their opinions into consideration then continues supporting what she believes to be right and alters her statement if her opinion shifts due to the new information. Even if the public disagrees wholeheartedly with what she believes in, she still stands firm. Even though her peers tell her she is dead wrong and is disgusted with her stance, she steels her resolve because it is honest.
Consider all your favorite leaders pop culture, Admiral Adama, Captain Kirk, Wonder Woman, Superman, Batman, Captain America etc. The reason we love them so much is not because of their physical might or talent but their iron will when it comes to standing up for what they believe in and never standing down to all their adversaries. When it comes to comic books, leadership is black and white and when we read them we say “I would do the same thing.” but in the real world, many of us geeks rarely stand out from the crowd in fear of disapproving glances from others. But why?
To give real life examples of the difference between leadership and following, I once went to lunch with a group of close friends and one member of our group was not present. The entire lunch period was spent talking behind that person’s back as they murmured about how they should cancel the absent friend’s event because he/she was not good enough for their time. The followers of this bunch halfheartedly nodded in agreement to the person who began the bashing. I defended the absent person in a diplomatic fashion the entire time. They told me that I should dislike the absent friend because of X, Y, and Z reasons. I had to inform them that the absent person always did right by me and they were my tried and true friend. If they invited me to their event I would go and support them. Needless to say I was not very popular with the majority of my peers. Later, the absent friend came to me in confidence and thanked me for supporting them when no one else would, one by one the other friends who reluctantly bashed our absent friend apologized to me for not being honest and standing up for our friend. When I asked why they chose to talk bad about our friend, they said they did not want any conflict.
I amazes me that in this day and age we play/read/watch heroes who do what is right for no other reason than because it is right and yet a majority of us cower in the shadows because they do not wish to have conflict. Conflict in this day and age is nothing more than being unfriend on social networks and having someone turn their nose up to you, it’s nothing at all. Yet so many fear this rejection and later face the humiliation of being found out to be a coward and lose honor. What has happened to the days where men and women had codes of honor, a set of personal rules they vowed never to forsake for they knew it would tarnish themselves into becoming something less than what they knew they could be.
On a less intense situation where leaders and followers were involved, a good friend of mine introduced me to Street Fighter VI. He told me to play any character and get good so all of our friends could play. Being a huge Dan Hibiki fan, I chose him and since that day my friend has tried time and again to get me to switch. He told me the stats of Dan Hibiki and explained how he was an inferior character and I should choose anyone but him. I acknowledged the information and refused to change because Dan was the character I wanted to play. With each new argument he would begin, I would hear him out, acknowledge the facts and tell him that I still wish to play Dan. His frustration went through the roof that anytime I mentioned the character, he shot back stating that he is garbage and should be removed from the game and how the community hated him etc. Although I enjoyed him getting so heated about my choice, I had to tell him that I enjoy the game because of Dan and only Dan. I would never win EVO or any tournament and was alright with that, I just wanted to have fun. So I continued to play Dan and he eventually came around and began helping me with my combat strategies. Had I submitted to him, I would have played a better character but would not enjoy the game as much due to not playing Dan and probably would have dropped the game much faster than before.
I apologize if this read off as one big rant, my main point of this article is to reach out to those geeks who are constantly belittled and harassed for their choices and choose to conform rather than stand up for themselves. You may think you are taking the path of less resistance but instead you are choosing the path of self destruction and might even burn bridges you never intended to. if Bill Gates, George Lucas, Steven Spielberg, Gary Gygax, Steve Jobs, Gabe Newell, or any other geek god chose to be a follower rather than a leader then the world would have been terribly bland. The world needs leaders. Followers have their place but only if they follow a leader they can believe in, but even in order to do that you need to be a leader when it comes to your choices. So take a moment and examine your life. Have you been leading? Are the choices you made a result of someone else or are they your honest actions? besides, if your friends aren’t willing to tolerate your honest feelings, are they even friends at all?
Maybe it’s time to make a few changes.
Chicano | Fighting/Writing for Diversity | DM since 08 | Anime Lover | Site: https://www.thegeeklyfe.com | info@thegeeklyfe.com | http://twitch.tv/that_deangelo | https://linktr.ee/deangelomurillo
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