Misadventures of Darth Mexican: The Waitress

Hey friends!

Darth Mexican here, and I have noticed that in the course of running The Geek Lyfe some wild adventures have taken place. I spend a lot of time writing all kinds of articles, so I figured this would be a great way to entertain you all with my mishaps!

On a Spring night like any other, I found myself at the Crescent Ballroom to watch one of my favorite local bands, Bear Ghost. While their performance is more than enough of a reason to get out

of the house, I was actually there to meet someone for business. A group of friends had gone as well and together we chowed down on some fantastic food.

A beautiful young woman standing a few inches above five feet and equipped with a bright smile served us. When she saw me arrive, her jaw dropped as she hurried over to examine my Anime Trash Swag ‘Senpai’ hat. After years of wearing the hat, it came as no surprise when people commented on it because of the gold lettering and spikes. She cried out “Your hat is so amazing!” as she touched it, I replied “Thanks!” as always.  She hurried off to snag me a glass of water and a menu and I greeted my friends who, to my surprise, all were gawking at me in disbelief.

“You are an idiot,” one friend said as he shook his head.
“De, she was obviously flirting with you!” another followed up as he gestured from me to where she has just been standing.

I scoffed and gave a look of skepticism, “Please,” I began my defense, “everyone always acts that way around my hat. It was nothing!” My friends were clearly disappointed in me as they transitioned the conversation to another topic. As the night went on, like clockwork she came to me asking, “Do you need anything?” every few minutes. I was confused as to why she was acting this way, especially when another person at my table needed her drink refilled and it wasn’t until I flagged for assistance that my friend was helped. I chalked it up to a busy night for her and dismissed it since Bear Ghost tends to bring a big crowd. The waitress dropped off our checks after a while and I gave over my card.

Eventually my business contact arrived and we talked shop a table away from where my friends and I had dinner. While discussing a potential collaboration and its various threats and strengths, the waitress dropped off the completed checks and cards. A friend of mine cut into the conversation and looked to me, “Hey man, I’m sorry to interrupt but our check arrived. You need to fill it out,” is what he said while my face twisted into one of surprise. “Oh I already gave her my card. It is paid for so I’ll go ahead and write the tip after I am done talking.” Dissatisfied, he walked away and I apologized to my associate before continuing our talk.

After five minutes, the same friend came again and cut in. This time he was aggressive as he slammed the check book into my chest and said “You need to do this right now.” In response, I rolled my eyes at the situation that a paid dinner receipt would concern him so much.

Frustrated, I flipped open the book and glanced to the left where my copy was tucked away and on it read: “Thanks! :)” Below it was more writing but my frustration caused me to disregard it. I instead focused on giving a 20% tip, filling out the total, and then signing my name. I threw down my pen into the book and snapped it shut. The waitress came by, picked up the book, and then left.  I gave yet another apology again to my associate as we wrapped up our talk with promises of our best effort towards mutual gain.

I returned to my friends and they looked upon me with anticipation as one said “Well?”

Stunned by their unknown need, I sat at the table and replied “Well, what? The meeting?” A few of them groaned while taking a drink of their beer.

“No! The receipt. Did you keep it?” My face turned to an expression of utter confusion and they responded with laughs of disbelief.

“Why would I have kept the rece-”

“BECAUSE SHE LEFT YOU HER NUMBER!”

I scoffed again and dismissed the notion. “The lies! Whatever!” At this point they had all given up on me. Thankfully, Bear Ghost soon got on stage and took everyone’s mind off the situation. As always they blew away expectations and caused a legion of fans to dance. Afterwards we all gave well wishes and parted ways.

On the drive home I blasted My Chemical Romance and sang every lyric of every single song until my throat hurt, as is the only way to appreciate quality music. My phone lowered the volume for a moment to give a notification of a new friend request. Curious, I opened the prompt for more details and I found a name I did not recognize. A female name.

Clicking on the profile did I find that it was a woman who worked for Crescent Ballroom and browsing through her public photos I came to the realization that it had been the waitress. The same woman who stood just above five feet who tended my my every need and tried to give her number and despite my obliviousness to her advances, she tracked me down. I accepted the request.

In true Darth Mexican fashion however, I have been too shy to message her. Now I feel the most rational course of action is to fake my death and start a new life in another country.

The End.